Gods Healing Oil
It happens every summer that more and more of my friends are getting married, I believe this summer I have the most weddings that I have been invited to, then I have ever gone to. Crazy eh? well I am happy for them and wish them the best in their new season of their life.
But with every wedding that comes around, so do the same old feelings of loneliness and thoughts of “when will it be my turn” syndrome. Some of you single girls know what I am talking about. I long to be held in the arms of my beloved and told that I am loved. But I do also know that I am not in that season of my life yet and that there is a lot of healing and working to do in my life yet.
Oh how I long for Gods healing oil to pour over me, you see my last and only relationship that I have been in was not a healthy one, I was blinded to a lot of things that when I did finally see them, I pushed it out of the way and didn’t look at those issues. Oh how I wish things could have been different that I could re-write that season of my life, but now I am only left with learning my lesson and pressing on, and working on the complete healing from that relationship, I gave my heart and everything I had into that relationship and all it brought was pain and wounds in the emotional and spiritual part of my life. I have been on the healing road for some time now, and boy is it a hard at times. To be able to forgive someone who has played a part in cutting you so deeply is hard at times. But the cool thing is that every time this guy comes to mind and all the pain and anger I feel, I pray for him, I pray blessings on him and that he will grow in Christ, I speak life to him. This is the only way I have been and will be able to forgive him.
I still hurt at times, my heart feels the twinge of pain shoot through me, not because of him or of that relationship but because I have feelings of being alone and unloved by anyone. Now for those of you who are seeing red flags, I know I am not alone that I have the best man I will ever need… AKA my Lord. I know that I am nothing with out God but I still feel the longing to be connected with the man that will be my husband. Its weird I know, but its also just feelings that I work through.
I know God has me in this season of singleness and its good for me, I need to heal and I need to work on me allowing God to make me into the women He’s created me to be and to gain experience so I can run a household and be a good wife.
posted by Sarah @ 10:57 PM
4 comments
4 Comments:
Wow sarah thats awesome I told God a little while ago I said you know what I am completly satisfied with you...I am one of those girls who would love to be married like yesterday...but I also know that now is not the time and I have so much to work on...I have so much to deal with before God brings me my knight in shining armor ha ha yes I am one of those girls...I bet you would have never guessed well have a great week and I know God is goin to great things in your life.
hi, you should teach me how to be single. i'm in a "type" of relationship but single at the same time.
me see ya tommorrow
Yeah, loneliness bites. Even with lots of friends it's still possible to be lonely, what's WITH that? A word of wisdom, (if there's any left in me), certainly there's room for being careful, but if people wait to have it "all figured out" and fully healed and all the rest, I fear we'll never start any sort of endeavor. I've changed my mind about this in recent years. Next I get the chance, I'm going to make a point of just "going out". Call it a date if you want, but I just want some one-on-one time. I learn far more from my mistakes than my successes, so I think it's time I start risking a little and get out there and get to know people. No expectations, no dreams to dash, just spending time with people you enjoy doing things you enjoy. Easy Breezy, Baby. It's been eight years since my last serious girlfriend and I still hurt when I think about it. That's life. Don't most people have a first heartbreak? I was caught up in some "pie in the sky" romantic notions of the perfect relationship, but I don't think it exists anymore. You find someone you admire and respect and work really, really hard. My job until then is to live my life without marriage as the supreme goal. That would be great, I think, but until then, IF then, I've just got to do my best to enrich myself, be interesting, be friendly, care about people, LIVE. That's all.
wow! I just want to say that the maturity in your writing and some of the comments left on friends blogs has blown me away! Sometimes we must go through things to learn about them! We MUST be content and find ourselves in God and not men... men will let you down if you try to find yourself, your beuty, your love in them! It is only through our heavenly Father that we are complete! It sometimes sucks to leave it in His hands and be content with His timming... but all in all its worth it! Be richly blessed!
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