How can I keep from singing....

How can I keep from singing

There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring

And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is your love
How can I keep from shouting your name
I know I am loved by the king
And it makes my heart want to sing

I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my savior lives

And I will walk with you
Knowing you’ll see me through
And sing the songs you give

I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing ‘cause you pick me up
Sing ‘cause you’re there
I can sing ‘cause you hear me, Lord
When I call to you in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I’ll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne

Wow has this song hit me today. How can I keep from singing????
Looking back over my lifetime I can count a number of reasons why I could stop singing and give up. Its not anything God has done but what I have done, having lost my grasp on this rock, having taken my eyes off my God and placing it onto the ‘storm’ (what ever the storm may be at the time). How stupid I can be.
My hearts one desire is to be at the feet of my Abba Father God. Yet I get distracted by the things of this world. Why is it that I always look away. For goodness sake the eyes of Father God are far better then anything this world could even try to offer. Why to I look at and go after the tin when Silver is right before me.
I am so tired of letting my eyes and heart get the best of me, and would very much like to just go home to be with God and forget the past and present. Just being able to sit on Gods lap and go running in the fields with Him. The worst part is that I know its not going to happen anytime soon (ok that’s not the worst part this is ->), and I know that no matter how much I vow to never take my eyes off of God again that my eye will catch something that is shinny and I will be off again on a rabbit trail chasing something that was never really there to begin with.
So with all that said I am here:
I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing ‘cause you pick me up
Sing ‘cause you’re there
I can sing ‘cause you hear me, Lord
When I call to you in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I’ll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne

I will keep singing,

Abba, I love you more then I can express right now. I know I don’t always do the things I should. But thank you for loving me and wanting me. Help me to keep my eyes on you instead of the ‘storm’ around me. Daddy…. How much my heart wants to express to you the love that is building at this very moment… but there are no words to articulate just how much I love you.

Enough is Enough

It’s not like I have had a ton of relationships because I haven’t been. But I am tired of falling for crushes and liking this guy and then that guy. I never wanted to date for the sake of dating but it’s like my eyes do.
I just don’t want to build a relationship, growing to know that person and having feelings for them when it isn’t going anywhere, and don’t tell me you like dating for the sake of dating.
Why would you want to spend time, money and energy with a guy you’re going to break up with? Not me, I am done with that, have been for awhile.
I only want to enter into a relationship that we are both interested in the possibility of getting married.

Today I went for a walk and I was talking with God and just thinking about what I will expect of my man (who ever it may be) when we enter into a dating/courting relationship, and it’s reasonable. And I will be open and real with the Man, Like this guy I have been talking with for the last little while. If he were to ask me to enter into a relationship with him, I would expect to talk about what his expectations are, and express what mine are. Even if he were to ask now what my expectations are in a dating relationship, I would tell him stright up and I would expect for him and any other guy to expect the same of me in any dating relationship.

Today’s girls we don’t do nothing to encourage the guys to step up and be Men. We just let guys be dogs and that’s not good, we need to raise the bar so they know we want a man.
But ya, for those of you guys who may read this, I totally know not all guys are dogs and there are those of you who are gentleman and are treating the girls you know like jewels. And I thank you for treating us like Gods jewels and treating us with respect.

But ya if you want me to give more detail then just ask.

Winds of Change

They say that the only thing that will stay the same is change. They also say that Change is good….. Well first of all, who is the they? And what do they know that I don’t know? Have they been through as much change as I have these last few months??? I don’t think so.
Now before you go off on me…
I total agree that change will always happen and that change is good, I am all up for change.
But one can only take so much change, so my question is how much change is too much?
Like school has started 5 months ago and already 5 of the faculty, staff and volunteers have left for different reasons, a number of people who are close to me and my family are getting extremely sick.
Changing is happening extremely fast and it’s not stopping, like for real. AHHHHH change sucks normally but now it sucks even more.
So like whatever, change will happen either way and I will endure it with Christ at my side.